I am not the woman I was before I had children, so I should not expect to behave + act like her. Although some habits she had seem dreamy and ideal right now, I don’t have the capacity to withhold them, or perhaps the desire. Maybe one day I will. But in this current season there are more demands on my time and energy, as I continuously navigate ways in which to make the best choices for myself and everyone involved.
I have to trust, if I could do better I would.
I have to trust in the wisdom of time unfolding.
I realize I also can monitor my thoughts for what they are : Truth? or Excuse?
Sometimes they both exist on a very fine line, blending into another. So, if I find myself following the path of an excuse, I have to trust that if I could have done better, chose differently, well – I would have.Post a comment
The not knowing is OK.
The unraveling is celebrated.
The repatterining applauded.
You need not be afraid of the vacant spaces.
You need not feel fraudulent if there are pockets of space for you to breathe, contrary to your beliefs that it all should be filled to the brim. You need space in order to feel your soul + who you are underneath, behind, within it all.
You can flounder a bit.
You can question a lot.
You can worry with fury, or you can choose to believe.
You can rest your mind within an active body.
You need not expect a thing because you have all you seek.
You need not strive, because you are thriving : and it is your job to realize all the ways you are soaring.
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Calling in :
I make art for the practice, not weighted by pressure. I stand in my power. I complete projects at hand.
I stay focused on my self + my family, rather than looking beyond for what I am searching for within.
I am intentional. I call in support.
Steeped in love. Grounded in heart. Elevated by vision.
Patience in laying the groundwork, honoring the unfolding.
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Healing thought patterns with the possibility of : What If?
What if the universe is conspiring with me and believing in me?
What if I am wired to succeed and to realize my dreams?
What if I already have?
What if I am truly connected to all?
What if it was easy?
What if I honor my body with movement + self care?
What if I connect to my spirit before I get busy crossing things off the list?
What if I am programmed to receive?
What if I choose thoughts of elevation rather than destruction?
What if I leaned on something greater?
What if I was patient?
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Lead me to higher ground, to elevated thinking.
Lead me out of the smallness of my mind and into a knowing of the infinite.
Allow my mind and my days to be spacious, able to bend time.
Let a clear vision guide me, and when the vision is blurred let patience steady me.
Let me believe that there is enough time, and let me be bold enough to claim what it is I want to fill my days.
Keep me steady with my commitment and flexible in how it unfolds, surrendered to the possibility of a deep magic infusing all of it, and a remembering of my brilliance.
Help me to forgive and lighten, regardless of how many times I make the same mistake.
Offer me a glimpse of myself in the places I least expect + let success feel like a natural progression of the unveiling of my heart.
Let me feel fully expressed + in the flow.
Captivated by beauty and connected to myself, and those around me.Post a comment
My visions are worth realizing.
I am capable of bringing them to life.
On some level they have already been achieved.
Shift me from the energy of frantically DOING.
Instead gracefully usher me into the art of BEING.
Trusting there is space for it all.
Valuing my time, my worth, my voice.
Remembering it never happens all at once.
It is gradual.
It is a practice.
Allow me to be steady and consistent in my commitment.
Allow me to enjoy the unfolding
. . .
above picture by : Le Moment CapturerPost a comment
The full moon beckons us to release so we can transform + heal this upcoming space. Healing from the residue of life. Finding the balm that soothes our heart and soul, and practicing it daily.
I contionusly release the unwavering self doubt, and that underlying feeling of never being good enough.
For this year I want to weave in all aspects of me into a coherent work of art.
Rather than scattered pieces here and there, scraps going unnoticed.
I want to embody a fluid and easy way of being, honoring support.
Welcoming huge sweeps of grace often.
Starting with gratitude, and connecting with hearts.
Seeing the value in organization and practicing the art of looking ahead.
Living in the questions, and letting the days provide the answers within.
More yielding, less pushing.
Guide me to see the greater vision.
Bring me closer to me.
. . .
May all your visions seep into your reality. Let them unravel from the heart.Post a comment
You have had such a grip on me that I felt unable to rest when in your presence. It felt hard to exhale, for I felt I have to prove the entirety of my worth in your every day. It was exhausting and I wanted another feeling.
One of expansion. Of deeply knowing my own sense of worth + valuing my well being, and not forgetting about magic, play, + flow. Then I prayed / asked for something different. Something lovely, something easy, something fun. And then we all got sick, one by one. For that might have been the only way to stop me in my tracks and surrender it all up. Now that we have recovered, we have healed, I stand ready to craft the remainder of this month with sustainabe pockets of stillness guiding me.
May this second half of the month represent a continuous celebration, one of warmth + light. One of where the pressure is off. Where less is more. Where a deep trust seeps into all that I do. Where spontaneity pours into the days. Where I am not out searching to get anything, only to give sweetly. Where I can look kindly in reflection, and softly ahead with intentions to guide what is ahead. Marveling in the rhythm shifting, unique to this time. And the hustle + bustle translates to flow + ease, and spacious simplicity.Post a comment
To honor the women who came before me.
To honor the women in my lineage.
To honor my grandmothers and my mother.
To pave a path for my daughter.
To walk down a path of healing.
To create beauty when the eyes are begging to fall upon beautiful things.
To create adornment.
To create from the contents of my heart.
To play with shape, form, color.
To play with the gems of the earth.
To dance with my intuition.
To access flow.
To make something that wasn’t there before.
To be in conversation with my soul.
A few of the reasons of why I make.
. . . .
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Every once in a while everything has to / gets to dissolve.
Like a tree shedding it’s leaves, the branches completely visible. An offering to the earth, a prayer for something new to emerge. A necessary release.
In this space of exposure may the judgements of : Why am I falling to pieces yet again? Why do I feel so revealed? Why do I ache so deeply, yearn for something so sweetly, desire so completely, something other than what this is right now? : subside.
Instead, layer on the tenderness. Celebrate the leaves that have fallen away, and nudge the ones that are still holding tight, it’s OK, you may let go, something new awaits.
It will take some time before the leaves begin to grow again, and then brilliantly + boldly once again change their form.
Allow yourself to fall into the abyss of uncertainty, swim in there for a while, let your ideas + expectations dissolve and trust that when you emerge, you will emerge whole. But then again, you remember : you are / were always complete, even though pieces of you were shattering, they were just layers being peeled off to getting closer to the heart of the matter.
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